If you're like me, I have a suggestion to make. When you're studying, have a separate notebook next to you to jot down all your lingering thoughts that pass by as you're reading about political bosses and reconstruction. It was amazing. I know it's probably not good to foster distracting thoughts while studying, but I came out with six pages in my notebook of just, stuff. It's probably a phase I'm going through (I've never questioned so much. Gone are the days when I would absorb and soak in everything as truth... I blame AP Lang. These past few classes have been amazing). But I feel incredibly enlightened right now.
Things I wondered (more jumbles of messy thoughts coming):
- If having a richer area usually has less crime, does that mean money fosters morals?
- Why's society trying to trap us in this set little bubble?
- Why are we always trying to prepare for something? Kindergarten prepares for first grade, middle school for high school, high school for college... where are we even going? Why can't we just be where we are instead of always preparing for something?
- If God made us so that we can worship Him, and we worship Him because He made us, what's the point? Circular reasoning frustrates me.
- What's the point of helping people if we're all going to die anyways? If it's so that they may live longer, what's the point of that, even?
- Is it okay to be corrupt when you're being charitable, since it gets the job done?
- Glamor always has a cost- think about the working class
- Should government and religion go hand in hand? (what do you think, please?)
- I think that the people who always have a problem with this world are the ones who can't find love.
And then I realized-- (almost) all my answers lie in God. God gives purpose to everything. He gives me the love I need. We exist because He loves us. We could not exist- that'd probably make things so much easier- but He loves us. We worship because He loves us, and He made us in His image. We're the only ones of His creations who can think, and talk. Heh. What a relief.
And then, I spent the next few pages making lists. Of my clubs next year, of my opinions, of my college list, of magazine layouts, of a book list with books I need to read.
And then, I looked at everything and I thought, I can't do any of this. I can't make it into these colleges. I'm not special enough. And then I wrote- how come everyone believes in me except for me? I don't know. I seem to have confidence in all the trivial things, but none when it comes to what I'm capable of doing. I guess that's just scary.
Can you believe all this came to me when I was trying to read my APUSH review book? Not at one time, just after every three paragraphs or so, a thought would come, and I actually had paper nearby to jot it down. It was refreshing. I felt like Winston from 1984 (again?!), who jotted down ambiguous phrases in capital letters.
And I'm going to start making audio mixes, just with songs that represent the way I'm feeling or the time I'm going through. Charlie in The Perks of Being a Wallflower did that, and I love the idea. He named one CD "My first time driving," and he knew that in ten years he'd be able to listen to that CD and remember exactly how he had felt. So I went to Staples and bought fifty blank CDs, and I'm excited, really. I also bought colored pens (and spent ten minutes debating whether I should spend the money to do so), and no, you can not borrow them.
Thanks for reading.
This is the one post I'd like you to comment on. Just your thoughts. About anything. And everything. I'd appreciate that.
6 comments:
Hey, seems strange yet also comforting that we are not alone in thinking deep thoughts and wonderings about why we exist. Here is a link to a conference message that someone once passed along to me which I have listened to repeated times and found insightful.
http://www.desiringgod.org/Search/?search=vodie+bauchum&submit.x=0&submit.y=0&submit=submit
Hang in there girl and keep looking up :)
Blessings, Eritia
"If having a richer area usually has less crime, does that mean money fosters morals?"
No, it means that poverty deprives you of morals. It is not money that encourages ethics; it is the lack of money that denies it.
(Morality comes second when you can't even afford to eat, no?)
"Should government and religion go hand in hand?"
Establishment clause of the Constitution says secularization ftw.
Its so cliche---but the reason these sayings become cliche is because they are the ultimate answer to everything
love is the most important thing
I think that we are so influenced by what we read---we take on characteristics of the protagonists or some random character that you felt a pang of connection with.
imagine if we read about jesus all the time..
We don't help others for them to live (physically) longer... We love them because Christ loves them. We love them to show God's love. And if it leads them eternal life, then it's all worth it. And (like we already discussed) He created us out of love; He doesn't really need our worship, but we get the pure joy of partaking in His glory.
And I personally think secularization is just as bad as imposing religion, since you're imposing non-religiousness. Think of the education system... And faith loses meaning when we decide it shouldn't be in EVERY aspect of our lives.
Oh and it's not so much that you should believe in yourself (humanism is tricky) but that you should believe that GOD is using you in awesome ways and that He's got a super duper awesome plan for you <3
I like this song by Priscilla Ahn, by the way. Some parts remind me of the Bird and the Bee.
1. Does money foster morals? This question implies causation. We should be careful with saying anything causes anything. I see correlation but not causation. Who's to say that morals are more bankrupt in poorer areas? The morals in more blessed areas seem to neglect the blessings and God even more than those in poorer areas. Morals don't just mean stealing, murderer, etc. It includes lust, hate, envy, greed, etc.
2. That is what the world does
3. Pure pragmatism, there is no grand view, our school system is just set up to do what is practical, even if there is not purpose to its practicality.
4.Circular reasoning doesn't necessarily mean its wrong. Circular argument on the other hand is a fallacy, most common through begging the question fallacy. God made us so that His glory can be manifested in our worship of Him and we worship Him because that is why we were made. Is is necessarily wrong to say I am a student and students are supposed to do homework and I do homework because I'm a student? Or is that merely a good conclusion? Let's set this up.
1. God made us.
2. Our purpose is to glorify God.
3. Therefore we worship God.
5.The point of helping people is because God called us to do so. It may also be because one feels that their suffering should be relieved. It is also in a sense a way to preach God's good news. We live so until the day Jesus returns.
6. No, good works don't justify sins.
9. Jesus had a problem with this world, yet He still loved us :)
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