pinky promise

Guys. We're going to be the generation that changes
e v e r y t h i n g.

I promise. You promise, too.

Is Islam's Allah the same as Christianity's God?

I feel sad, when I think of how vehemently and passionately Muslims worship their Allah. So I wonder, is it possible that they might be worshiping the same God as me, with different traditions and with a few nuances in belief? Is it really true that they're going to hell, regardless of all that worshiping, regardless of all the prayer and all the time they devote?

And then I remembered, no. No, no, no.

Let me remind you that we don't even deserve to be on this Earth, and that the only reason we're still walking around and smelling the flowers is because of God's grace. So who am I, in the first place, to be picking and choosing who deserves to go to heaven or not? The truth is, we all deserve to go to hell. The end. That's it. So every single person who is born again and who claims Jesus as Savior is, well, something that we should celebrate, just like we celebrate when couples wed and when students graduate. But the truth is, not everyone weds, and not everyone graduates, regardless of how brilliant he might be or how beautiful she might look.

I mean, getting into heaven was never supposed to be this easy.

But it is, simply because of Jesus's love. The problem is, though, that Muslims don't believe this. It isn't just some black and white fallacy, where you say, well golly gee, Christianity's harsh because it says that Muslims will go to hell because they don't believe Jesus rose again, that's terrible. Because the fact is- they're missing out on a whole chunk. They might have the buns of a sandwich, but they don't have the meat (haha, literally). A pastor once said that while all the other religions depended on works- how closely you follow the commandments, how many times you pray, how nice you are to your neighbor- Christianity depends on faith. That's it. We can sin and not be condemned, as long as we repent, because God will be right there to pick us up and forgive us. How is that not amazing?! We can go to heaven, hallelujah, because we believe in God's love. Our whole religion is based around love. I mean, because of His love, He sent Jesus to the cross to die and rise again to be our sacrifice, so that we don't have to kill a cow every weekend to repent, and we don't have to freak out about hell every time we sin.

But see- Muslims don't have that. And so our religions are completely different. They don't believe that Jesus rose from the dead. They don't believe in everlasting life through faith. And I mean, I'm sorry, but the fact that they don't believe that just sounds so silly to me. Why wouldn't they believe that God loves us enough to have His son rise from the dead? Do they even believe in God's love, I don't know? I'm not too much of a scholar on the religion, but I know that it's not the same as what I believe. While they might pray more than me and help the needy more than me, they don't feel the same love I do, nor are they called to love in the same way. I don't mean to generalize or offend, but all the warfare out in the middle east is a perfect example of the ways our calls to action differ. All I'm trying to say is that not confessing Jesus as Savior is a pretty big deal. Love is a pretty big deal.

And it's all just kind of sad. I have so much grief for the people who don't know God's love. They're missing out on so much, and they don't even realize it.

There's another thing though- Muslims believe that Adam was faultless.

So where'd all the sin come from then...?

I'm enlightened...? Hardly.

If you're like me, I have a suggestion to make. When you're studying, have a separate notebook next to you to jot down all your lingering thoughts that pass by as you're reading about political bosses and reconstruction. It was amazing. I know it's probably not good to foster distracting thoughts while studying, but I came out with six pages in my notebook of just, stuff. It's probably a phase I'm going through (I've never questioned so much. Gone are the days when I would absorb and soak in everything as truth... I blame AP Lang. These past few classes have been amazing). But I feel incredibly enlightened right now.

Things I wondered (more jumbles of messy thoughts coming):

• If having a richer area usually has less crime, does that mean money fosters morals?
• Why's society trying to trap us in this set little bubble?
• Why are we always trying to prepare for something? Kindergarten prepares for first grade, middle school for high school, high school for college... where are we even going? Why can't we just be where we are instead of always preparing for something?
• If God made us so that we can worship Him, and we worship Him because He made us, what's the point? Circular reasoning frustrates me.
• What's the point of helping people if we're all going to die anyways? If it's so that they may live longer, what's the point of that, even?
• Is it okay to be corrupt when you're being charitable, since it gets the job done?
• Glamor always has a cost- think about the working class
• Should government and religion go hand in hand? (what do you think, please?)
• I think that the people who always have a problem with this world are the ones who can't find love.

And then I realized-- (almost) all my answers lie in God. God gives purpose to everything. He gives me the love I need. We exist because He loves us. We could not exist- that'd probably make things so much easier- but He loves us. We worship because He loves us, and He made us in His image. We're the only ones of His creations who can think, and talk. Heh. What a relief.

And then, I spent the next few pages making lists. Of my clubs next year, of my opinions, of my college list, of magazine layouts, of a book list with books I need to read.

And then, I looked at everything and I thought, I can't do any of this. I can't make it into these colleges. I'm not special enough. And then I wrote- how come everyone believes in me except for me? I don't know. I seem to have confidence in all the trivial things, but none when it comes to what I'm capable of doing. I guess that's just scary.

Can you believe all this came to me when I was trying to read my APUSH review book? Not at one time, just after every three paragraphs or so, a thought would come, and I actually had paper nearby to jot it down. It was refreshing. I felt like Winston from 1984 (again?!), who jotted down ambiguous phrases in capital letters.

And I'm going to start making audio mixes, just with songs that represent the way I'm feeling or the time I'm going through. Charlie in The Perks of Being a Wallflower did that, and I love the idea. He named one CD "My first time driving," and he knew that in ten years he'd be able to listen to that CD and remember exactly how he had felt. So I went to Staples and bought fifty blank CDs, and I'm excited, really. I also bought colored pens (and spent ten minutes debating whether I should spend the money to do so), and no, you can not borrow them.

Thanks for reading.

This is the one post I'd like you to comment on. Just your thoughts. About anything. And everything. I'd appreciate that.

the three types of people

“THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN A DREAM WORLD, AND THERE ARE SOME WHO FACE REALITY; AND THEN THERE ARE THOSE WHO TURN ONE INTO THE OTHER.”

Currently: feeling overwhelmed with thoughts, questions, and school. Going in circles about the point of existence and the point of helping. Wondering how long it'll take for summer. And if I'll ever get to opening my physics books. And feeling extremely tired, and contemplating whether it's because of the tea I drank today or the SAT classes I had to endure. Realizing, also, that this is all probably a waste of my time. And wishing it didn't have to be so expected.

Questions and questions; where are the answers?

Too many thoughts mingling together in my head at once, it's not healthy. Time to straighten out some and send them on their way, out my ears and to some other poor soul's head.

I'm really tired, but I have to make sure I get everything out and hopefully find some answers before I forget these thoughts. Prepare for rambling and unanswered questions, if you still want to read. ---

It's so frustrating, when you hear a really good friend of yours talk about things you don't agree with. And I don't mean some small disagreement, like whether the colors on the walls are tacky or whether the latest hit record really deserves to be incessantly played on the radio, but I'm talking about completely opposite views on the purpose of life. It's frustrating because you know they're wrong. You want to tell them to cheer the hell up and find some optimism. Or to not be so hedonistic, and to think about others for once, even if it might not give him pleasure. It's not all about you.

But then, who says it's not all about you? If you don't have religion and you don't care about morals, then what's the point of following society or trying to be nice and honest? It does seem to make sense that people would think enjoying themselves should be the point of this life. If having sex with girls gives you pleasure, then hey, why not? If you like to gorge yourself with frozen yogurt everyday, what's stopping you? If you like to make fun of people, bring others down, step on them, then who's going to stop you? I used to think that there'd be some kind of conscience or moral figure hiding underneath the thickness of their brains, but when I really think about it, there's not really a point for them to care about a conscience at all. If they don't believe that God's real, then suddenly, everything becomes about you. Does that make sense?

And I don't know what to say to these people. I was speechless, honestly. How do you convince someone to care about other people? How do you teach an opinionated teenager how to have morals?

And then, another thought to dwell on- there really isn't such thing as joy without religion, is there? This is all a revelation to me; I've never really looked at things from a nonbeliever's standpoint. But when you think about it, how possible is it to really find happiness in a country where everyone goes to work in cubicles and ends up hating their jobs, where everyone ends up hating their spouses and family and decides to live the end of life on a couch watching football? It's so unlikely. Almost every adult hates his/her job. But no matter how much I hope for people who will love their jobs, the truth is, somebody's got to work in the cubicle.

And then, one guy mentioned that the only dose of happiness someone could get in this world was through drugs. And here, I get another revelation- people don't just smoke to look cool. They really are trying to escape something. It gives them those few moments of bliss, so that they can feel okay amidst this not-okay environment. I know it sounds terrible, but god, it's true. And what do you say to these people?

And another thought! It's just overwhelming, really, it is, but this one might be one of Ayn Rand's thoughts. Is it possible for someone to be truly altruistic and selfless? Because if you're that selfless, then you'll never be able to figure out who you are, right? And then, what's the point of that? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. All I know is that when you're altruistic, you feel so rewarded. You feel so great. But then, what if you're only being altruistic to feel rewarded? To gain a sense of importance? Then it's not completely selfless anymore. But for this one, I just figure that it doesn't really matter. It's probably impossible to reach complete selflessness, simply because humans sin, and that's that.

Here's something else that's interesting, if you want more.

So this one kid, who I always had the impression of being a lazy procrastinator who wasted his enormous potential, said something that blew my mind. There's actually reasoning behind his procrastinating, and that's that he's afraid. He's afraid of what will happen if he applies himself. That he'll be disappointed and not get the result that he had hoped for, after putting in all the effort. That he'll try so hard and won't be able to improve. And so by procrastinating, he has an official excuse that he can use, should he fail at something or do badly. He's able to just brush it off and say, oh, I just procrastinated. If I had tried, I could've done better. I never even knew. And it's sad, really. Because it's still wasted potential. I wish some people would just get over their fears already and step on it, because this world needs some changing.

I swear. I could ramble more about other various things that I think about, but these are the recent ones since well, yesterday. And I'm not even going to go back and re-read this post to make sure it actually makes coherent sense, because I'm pretty sure it doesn't make sense, and besides, I need to go to bed.

Sorry for the messiness. My name does rhyme with messy, after all.

Hello- screw the classic layout- back to this good old traditional blogger layout thing. Text is officially bigger & softer on the eyes, which makes posts seem exhaustingly long and practically impossible to read through. Ah, well.

One more thing-
I just realized that I only have eight followers.
And all I have to say is-
Thank you eight. It means an enormous lot to me. :)

Donate with a click-

If you're looking for ways to procrastinate, you might as well save lives while you're at it-

http://www.thenonprofits.com/

A whole list of the donate-with-one-click websites.

Think world hunger, people.

Colourlovers

I never thought I'd enjoy colors so much. Okay, this is false. I've always loved colors. But this website is simply genius.

Did you know that just like photographs, music, movies, and books, colors can bring back memories too? That strange, nostalgic feeling that creeps out from heaps of forgotten memories? If you're not the sentimental type to have a personal connection with colors, then you'll at least agree with me that they can tell stories.

www.colourlovers.com

Is it just me?

One day I will create my own layout for this blog.

And it will be beautiful.

beauty ain't objective, hon.

"It's like he would take a photograph of Sam, and the photograph would be beautiful. And he would think that the reason the photograph was beautiful was because of how he took it. If I took it, I would know that the only reason it's beautiful is because of Sam.

I just think it's bad when a boy looks at a girl and thinks that the way he sees the girl is better than the girl actually is. And I think it's bad when the most honest way a boy can look at a girl is through a camera. It's very hard for me to see Sam feel better about herself just because an older boy sees her that way."

- The Perks of Being a Wallflower

By the way, guys, beauty is not objective.

You can think someone is beautiful without needing confirmation.

You can be beautiful without someone telling you.

There's no such thing as "lying" about beauty.

You are who you think you are.
And that's that.